Curb Your Blogging...

Larry David from Curb Your Enthusiasm and Seinfeld fame posted over at Huffpost. He was having trouble sleeping. Excerpt of what was going through his mind as he tried to get some shut-eye:

No matter how hot it is, the bottom of the pillow still stays cool. One day I’d like to ask a scientist about that. Of course, I never really get to meet any scientists. You’d think I’d run into a scientist at some point. I like how they keep saying the science isn’t in on global warming. They just don’t know. No proof. But, of course, it’s in on God. Lots of proof on that. Tons of empirical evidence. They got God’s DNA...You'd think anyone who believes this stuff would be so embarassed they'd keep it to themselves. But those maniacs shout it from the rooftops and they're running our country. God talks to Bush all the time. I don’t care if you’re President, if you say God talks to you, you’re a schizophrenic and a menace to society. You should be on drugs in a mental institution, like the Son of Sam. What’s the difference between God or a dog talking to you? It’s still a voice in your head. That means you’re certifiably fucking crazy!

Holiday Readership Roundup

Over the course of the holidays, I ran into quite a few of our lurkers (people that read the blog religiously, but don't comment). All of them had great things to say, so obviously we're doing something right. And there's way more regular readers than just a half dozen people.

One of my goals for the next year is to continue to expand our readership modestly. I have no goal to be a big national blog, but I want to encourage more vigorous debate like we've seen on the Tookie issue or the textbook debate. If you know people that might enjoy the forum, feel free to forward the link.

I also hope to enlist more regular contributors to increase and diversify our content. I'd really like more commentary on books, music, sports, social issues and culture. If anyone would like to be a contributor, feel free to either comment or send me an email at steve_buck_1999@yahoo.com.

Also, several folks have refrained from commenting because they were unaware that one can comment anonymously or under a pseudonym. You can and please do. When you click the comment link, you have the option to either register, comment under a name of your choosing, or comment anonymously.

Another common theme seems to be that because I devour all news, I assume everyone else does as well and don't give enough background on many of my political posts. I'll try to improve in this area; not by toning down the content or spoonfeeding in any way...just doing a little more setup.

Thanks to all readers and contributors for your participation and your comments.

Clydesdale Blogging

To ring in the holidays, this end-of-week blog brings us the Clydesdale, mascot of Budweiser - a company that will benefit greatly from my patronage over the next four days. The Clydesdale is a proud breed...something I will not be after I drink a couple of dozen Buds. The Clydesdale is a hard working draft horse. I will be working hard drinking drafts like a horse. The Clydesdale is noted for its distinctive large furry hooves and powerful gait. Note how my erratic gait makes it appear as if, instead of feet, I'm walking on large furry hooves after consuming a bunch of buds.

Happy Holidays...may they be over soon and may I remember little of them.

Update: MJ reminds that they can also kick field goals.

Christmas Sourpuss

I'm a Christmas sourpuss. I've yet to seek confirmation, but I may very well be afflicted with SAD (Seasonal Affected Disorder, or some such). Every year the tandem of Thanksgiving-Christmas-Valentines collude to put me in a low place. This year, I've tempered the effect somewhat by dramatically increasing my comsumption of alcohol and cigars. It's helped.

Christmas is the crawfish of holidays. It's too much work for not enough meat. My opinion of the season has been further jaundiced by this year's War on Christmas schtick from Fox News. It's allowed both political edges to get way too much play: the righteous right and the PC pissy-pants left. How about all of you shut the fuck up and chill. With that sentiment in mind, I encourage everyone to read Christopher Hitchens pantsing of Christmas. For those that don't, enjoy the passage below:

A revealing mark of [Christian enthusiasts] insecurity is their rage when public places are not annually given over to religious symbolism, and now, their fresh rage when palaces of private consumption do not follow suit. The Fox News campaign against Wal-Mart and other outlets—whose observance of the official feast-day is otherwise fanatical and punctilious to a degree, but a degree that falls short of unswerving orthodoxy—is one of the most sinister as well as one of the most laughable campaigns on record. If these dolts knew anything about the real Protestant tradition, they would know that it was exactly this paganism and corruption that led Oliver Cromwell—my own favorite Protestant fundamentalist—to ban the celebration of Christmas altogether.

No believer in the First Amendment could go that far. But there are millions of well-appointed buildings all across the United States, most of them tax-exempt and some of them receiving state subventions, where anyone can go at any time and celebrate miraculous births and pregnant virgins all day and all night if they so desire. These places are known as "churches," and they can also force passersby to look at the displays and billboards they erect and to give ear to the bells that they ring. In addition, they can count on numberless radio and TV stations to beam their stuff all through the ether. If this is not sufficient, then god damn them. God damn them everyone.

Buddhist-wear

We've made some progress learning about other religions and so-called intelligent design. There seems to be mixed feelings among the Jewish community, with many abstainers. Bruce chimed in today with this article divorcing intelligent design from Buddhism and suggested (probably with tongue in cheek) that Buddhism may be the path for him (pun intended).

This reminded me of a funny t-shirt that I need to buy. It contains the following quote, "Buddhism, the religion that offers nothing...and Delivers." Check the site out, there's some other interesting Buddhist merch.

FISA Rubber Stamp

Regarding the domestic spying scandal, a lot of critics, including myself, have indicated that the president didn't need to circumvent the law because the FISA court would have approved his requests. We hear that the FISA court has only rejected five court orders out of, what, 15,000 requests? Given those numbers, I have to question how effective the oversight of domestic spying is even with FISA.

Domestic Spygate Watch

So some former NSA types have chimed in on their thoughts about domestic spying over at the Defensetech blog. I especially liked this quote from a former spook:

"It's drilled into you from minute one that you should not ever, ever, ever, under any fucking circumstances turn this massive apparatus on an American citizen," one source says. "You do a lot of weird shit. But at least you don't fuck with your own people."

Couldn't agree more. Diane Rehm had three conservatives on her NPR show yesterday, all of which were outraged by the President's actions on this matter. It seems we may have the makings of true bipartisanship here. Let's hope.

Satanic Design

My brother sent me this fine article about the evolution vs. intelligent design non-argument. It contained this interesting passage:

Many who accept the fact of evolution cannot, however, on religious grounds, accept the operation of blind chance and the absence of divine purpose implicit in natural selection. They support the alternative explanation of intelligent design The reasoning they offer is not based on evidence but on the lack of it...It is in essence the following: There are some phenomena that have not yet been explained and that (and most importantly) the critics personally cannot imagine being explained; therefore there must be a supernatural designer at work. The designer is seldom specified, but in the canon of intelligent design it is most certainly not Satan and his angels, nor any god or gods conspicuously different from those accepted in the believer’s faith.

I like the formation of Intelligent Design with Satan and his angels as designers. Maybe that will be my new dogma...what a great contrarian position. It would go like this:

I.D. Believer: And because you haven't found the missing link in your so-called "fossil record," that's proof enough that there must have been a divine hand involved!

Me: Yes, I totally agree, and that divine hand was undoubtably the hand of SATAN!

That should be fun. But really, if this is such a neat way to wrap up the existence of a divine being, why haven't I heard an outcry from all religions of the world. I ask this seriously. Why is it just Christian Evangelicals that believe this? Do Sikhs, for example, believe in I.D.? Hindus or Jews? Are Christians the only major religion that has had to reconcile religion with modern science because Christian society tends to be more scientifically advanced? If that's the case, I'd expect to encounter some Rabbinical backing for I.D. somewhere.

I'd like to know the perspective from all the major religions in the world on evolution. Despite the solid base within the scientific and non-believer community, statistics tell us evolution hasn't caught on. How long can the masses of the world deny science? Are other religions trying to gin up some intellectual alchemy to marry God with science?

Hypocrisy Update

Building on the Domestic Spygate post below, I just got smacked in the face by a wet paintbrush full of hypocrisy. The government is claiming that the president has the right to do whatever the hell he wants to protect the country as commander-in-chief. I'd say justifying spying on Americans by using his "Commander-in-Chief" powers as enumerated in the constitution represents a break from the oft-repeated line about "strictly interpreting" the constitution. Would a true strict-constructionist see that the constitution allows the president to break laws in times of war? Especially spying on citizens? Or is that whole strict-constructionist slogan just b.s. shorthand for the Constitution not explicitly containing a right to privacy and therefore rendering Roe null and void.

He could have handled this all through FISA, they just didn't want to hassle with it and thought they were above the law.

Domestic Spygate

Let me begin by saying I have no problem with the government using wiretaps to catch bad guys. This has been going on forever and allows for some pretty creative law enforcement (especially for fans of the excellent HBO drama, The Wire). But, I'm still firmly atop my civil liberties high-horse, and therefore oppose the arbitrary way in which these wiretaps have been implemented by King George II. I have problems with their justification on the following fronts:

1. Speed. They claim that they have to circumvent the existing laws because of speed. However a special court has been set up precisely to address this concern (FISA court). According to reports, this court is generally able to turn around a warrant in a matter of hours. If the need is more urgent than that, the NSA is allowed to pursue the wiretap provided they notify the court later. This court almost never refuses a wiretap and certainly wouldn't refuse a wiretap on someone who's supposedly linked with Al Qaeda. I think this sufficiently bollixes King George's argument about speed.

2. Unchecked Executive Power. King George claims he has sworn to defend the country and that his powers as commander-in-chief allow him the latitude to do what needs to be done in this pursuit. Consider the Congress emasculated because the president is in charge. Can't he then pretty much do whatever he wants under the guise of "protecting Americans." Take for instance the Patriot Act. Most of the provisions of the Patriot Act are responsible measures necessary to prosecute the war on terror (how I hate that phrase). If King George is so pissed at the Senate for not making permanent the Patriot Act because one or two provisions have nasty civil liberties implications, why doesn't he just declare these provisions necessary to protect the country based on his commander-in-chief powers? Govern by executive fiat.

3. He's briefed congress. I think King George's defense that he's "briefed congress" is the biggest red herring of them all. I say, "so what?" The law says you need a warrant from the courts to wiretap someone domestically. So he tells Congress? Shame on them for not raising a stink, but they're separate from the main point here. His notification of Congress just spreads out the blame a little bit.

4. International calls. Oh, hey, don't worry...these were all international calls. Since when is there a wiretap just for international calls? I'd like to trust the NSA to look at an incoming or outgoing number and upon seeing an international country code, put on their headphones. But really. They've made it quite clear that the goal of these taps is to prevent attacks. What's stopping a zealous wiretapper from listening to all calls hoping for a juicy nugget? I wish I could I say I trusted the government to do the right thing, but they've shown nothing but scorn for the law with respect to intelligence, torture, rendition, and political opponents (and probably lots of other things that we'll be learning about soon).

They don't have a cogent rationale for their actions circumventing law. Given that the existing law wouldn't have required much of an effort for compliance, it appears that they just thought it to be a hassle (or maybe quaint, in their parlance for the Geneva Conventions).

Update: And to take it to an Orwellian doomsday syllogism... We know that our own military has been spying on protesters in the name of national defense. The military claims that these protesters were a threat to military personnel or equipment, and this, therefore, justified their surveillance.

So, now it's obvious that there are those in the government/military that feel that criticizing the government endangers the military.

The president has the virtually unlimited power to do anything, including spying on Americans, against threats.

Therefore, if you criticize the government, you're fair game for wiretapping and surveillance.

Freedom Erosion Watch

More evidence of Bush playing fast and loose with civil liberties: the NSA has been spying on people in America without courd orders. Next thing you know I'll be forced to quarter troops in my house. Do laws mean anything to these people? When can we have an accountability moment?

Also on the "Freedom Erosion Watch," it appears that the GOP is going to exercise some political passive aggressiveness with respect to the Patriot Act. Even though there's a compromise on the table and there's very little standing in the way of passage with improvements to its civil rights implications, the GOP is going to refuse to compromise on allowing the FBI into people's library records. The reason...the can then say the Dem's refused to extend the Patriot Act and are therefore Pro-Terrorist; and they believe this will make a good campaign issue for the 2006 midterms. They don't have much more to run on, so they're willing to feign principle and hurt the country to get a political issue.

Best and Worst of 2005

I've begun my end-of-year stock taking and so I'm publishing one of those ass-whip end of the year best of/worst of lists. Like the Oscars, I can only remember what's happened in the last few months.

First things first:

In Memoriam: Hunter S. Thompson, Gonzo Journalist, who I can identify with about breakfast: "I like to eat breakfast alone, and almost never before noon; anybody with a terminally jangled lifestyle needs at least one psychic anchor every 24 hours, and mine is breakfast. In Hong Kong, Dallas or at home - and regardless of whether or not I have been to bed - breakfast is a personal ritual that can only be properly observed alone, and in a spirit of genuine excess. The food factor should always be massive: four Bloody Marys, two grapefruits, a pot of coffee, Rangoon crepes, a half-pound of either sausage, bacon or corned beef hash with diced chilies, a Spanish omelette or eggs Benedict, a quart of milk, a chopped lemon for random seasoning, and something like a slice of key lime pie, two margaritas and six lines of the the best cocaine for dessert...Right, and there should also be two or three newspapers, all mail and messages, a telephone, a notebook for planning the next 24 hours, and at least one source of good music...All of which should be dealt with outside, in the warmth of a hot sun, and preferably stone naked." From The Great Shark Hunt.

Medical Treatment of the Year: Epidural Steroidal Injections (ESI) - While the first ESI shot was one of the most unpleasant experiences of my life, it has tremendous upside. I went from being literally crippled due to a herniated disk between L-4 and L-5 to no pain at all in about two days. I've been virtually pain free for the last five months. Thinking about those shots gives me the willies, but it's powerful medicine.

Lowest Point of the Year: Montezeuma's Revenge. Period. I don't possess the vocabulary to accurately describe the sheer horrible-ness associated with this malady. The abdominal distress was seismic. There were hallucinations of animals being slaughtered.

Rockinest Song of the Year: MC5, Over and Over. MC5 was described here as a band that refused to be listened to quietly. But wait, you say, this song is 35 years old. Well, it was new to me. I've pretty much listened to three types of music this year: pre-punk (like the MC5), punk (like the New York Dolls), and post-punk (like Mission of Burma).

Smoke of the Year: Cuban Montecristo #2.

Accomplishment of the year: It's really sickening to think that one spends over 2000 hours a year working, and this time doesn't yield anything of which to be proud. Discussing this with a co-worker the other day, I realized I had a greater sense of accomplishment about the little red table I built for the patio than anything I had done at work. But the little red table isn't the accomplishment of the year...it took too long to build. Instead, it's the thirteen minutes I spent finally slaying the Jeopardy test. I'm now in the active contestant pool and could be contacted any day to appear. Those of you that saw me that morning realize the scale of the accomplishment.

Book of the Year: I really can't remember anything I've read. I'm reading a good book right now, Bill Bryson's A Short History of Nearly Everything. Maybe I need to switch back to fiction. I know I've enjoyed some Paul Theroux this year. Didn't David Sedaris have a new book out?

Wine of the Year: I'm not that fond of wine. I prefer Scotch. Like Chivas.

Regret of the Year (a.k.a Last Year's New Years Resolution I Failed to Accomplish): Exercising. I was either too busy or not busy enough, or my back hurt, or a million other excuses. I did buy an MP3 player to listen to when I exercise. I usually use it when I'm sitting on the patio smoking cigars and drinking scotch. This is pretty often.

Experiment of the Year: Q. Will a couple of big ice blocks cool down a hot as shit swimming pool in July. A. No, but it was worth doing.

Soup of the Year: Every year this is the most eagerly awaited category, which is why we present it last. Drum roll please. Second runner-up: Shrimp Bisque at the Parthenon. First runner-up: Red Posole at Sapristi. And the winner is.....Caldo de Pollo at El Asadero. The chicken soup at El Asadero is brothy goodness. Served classic style with a dark meat quarter on the bone and full of coarsely cut vegetables, this dish will cleanse your head physically and spiritually. Best enjoyed with a Negra Modelo cerveza (or two) on a Saturday afternoon when there's chill in the air.

Check back soon for final results of the "Beast of the Year" competition. Last I heard, Kinky the Backyard Rat was surging. Update: Kinky the Backyard Rat is a mighty bold beast at that. You should know that Kinky is a rat that lives in some brush by a big tree in my backyard. His/her food source is about 15 feet away in our compost bin. This is adjacent to our patio. Usually the rat does his food foraging while we're gone or inside. Well, the other day I was sitting on the patio and damned if the beast didn't just skitter right up to about five feet of me. I'm not sure this behooves him with respect to Beast of the Year, but it's mighty bold considering 90% of the time I'm outside I have Poofus the cat with me. Poofus has a reputation for cutting short the lives of rodentia. Stay tuned, dear reader.

Freedom Bites the Dust

If this MSNBC report is to be believed, we can hope never to hear "they hate us for our freedom" again from the president - because our freedom will be gone. Freedom is definitely not on the march here at home as our right to peaceful assembly has now fallen by the wayside. The report describes how the military is now spying on protesters. This joins other freedoms such as speech (criticizing the government is treasonous), religion, and many human and civil rights. I think all we can count on is the right to bear arms.

Australian for Ridiculous.

So I was reading a garden-variety news story about this rioting that's broken out in Australia between white supremacists and middle eastern types. Nothing terribly shocking there, as these are two groups that seem to find themselves amidst violence frequently. Nationalism and class/race warfare seems to be on the rise many places: like France, Belgium, Netherlands, and most scarily, China.

So while we're on a roll with some stereotyping, what took me aback was this quote:

The state government will also increase the jail term for rioting from five to
15 years and double the penalty for affray, fighting in public, to 10 years.

In Australia you used to get five years for fighting in public??? Now ten years?? That's Australian for the punishment not really fitting the crime. They're going to ruin their reputation. I hope no cops ever drop into an Australian Rules Football game.

Beaver blogging

As I'm far busier today than a typical Friday, I'll have to quickly opt for some busy beaver blogging. Be aware that the beaver is the largest rodent in North America. An interesting FAQ on beavers and their role in ecology can be found here. More pics here.

Pots, Kettles, etc.

Rumsfeld says:

"We've arrived at a strange time in this country where the worst about
America and our military seems to so quickly be taken as truth by the press, and
reported and spread around the world, often with little context and little
scrutiny, let alone correction or accountability after the fact."

Blame the press, sure, but who the hell is he to talk about context, scrutiny, correction, or accountability after the fact? The gall of these people is astounding.

Sloth Blogging

I'm really feeling like some Sloth blogging today. Thank goodness I found sloth.com. I always thought they were bigger, but actually there just a little bigger than a cat. According to the website, however, their ancestor, the Giant Ground Sloth, grew to the size of an elephant. I'm trying my best to evolve into the Giant Bed Sloth, which grows to the size of a big fat man.

Laptop Cameras

If there can be a digital camera in every 69.99 cellphone, every laptop computer should also have one built in.

I was facilitating a meeting today where I wrote a bunch of stuff on a whiteboard. After the meeting, I set about typing all of it into my laptop. I should have been able to just snap a digital pic of the whiteboard with a camera mounted on the back of the screen, and gone on my merry way.

So pass this along to HP, Dell, Lenovo, or Toshiba.

Word.